And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Randomize
