I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
