the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
