Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
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