Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
