I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
