She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
