some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
