why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize
