I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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