We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
