You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
