K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Randomize
