Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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