we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
