She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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