STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
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