i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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