I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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