I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
