You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
This is classic penis vs brain.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize
