Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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