When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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