Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
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