physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize