i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
