very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
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