Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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