Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Randomize
