I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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