I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
