Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
