Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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