i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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