that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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