so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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