stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Randomize
