Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
