Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
