yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Randomize
