Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize