4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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