She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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