...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
