So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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