Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize