I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize
