Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
