I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Randomize
