she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
